Irene’s family have received numerous sympathy cards and messages from people in their twenties to more long-standing friends and from different parts of the world. Some of the terms used tell us a lot about the woman that is Irene and how she has such a huge impact on all who know her. I am using the present tense here as who can doubt that Irene’s amazing spirit lives on? Friends and family talk of … “a one-off” “someone who inspired” “the person who always treated me well” “someone to look up to” “always ready with banter” So how can we define Irene, the lady with the sparkly eyes? Firstly, we should acknowledge the courageous way in which she confronted her final illness. She was keen for everyone to know that she had a full life and had done the things she wanted to. She was ready to accept her death and had a lifelong and devout Roman Catholic faith to support her in this. She spoke of how she was looking for the garden gate and once she found it, she would pass away and she was sure there would be a seat for her to sit down on as God would not leave her standing up as “He’ll have more than me to deal with that day, you know!” When tears threaten, think of Irene in that garden entertaining the troops and be at peace. 2009 has seen the world lose many of its greatest performers. Danny La Rue, Mollie Sugden, Wendy Richards and Michael Jackson to name but a few. Irene was a consummate performer – the best comedienne, a wonderful dancer with a cracking pair of legs and a singer of songs old and new. So as we remember Irene and our initial pain passes, I think we will not only smile but laugh out loud as we remember her wit and ability to turn an average day into the best party ever. Where Irene went, balloons and party poppers followed! Irene’s childhood was not the easiest and poverty as for many in the Thirties was an everyday reality. Irene’s family also faced discrimination due to their Irish Catholicism. Irene’s father, Lawrence, set high standards and her mother, Sally Anne,, taught Irene to aspire to better things. From her Dad, she got her ability to entertain and from her mother, her ability to bake and keep a good home. Irene was the middle child of seven. As the older children Agnes, Joe and Margaret went away to serve in the war effort, Irene helped with the younger ones, Winnie, Lawrence and Gerald. This background made Irene a fighter and an upholder of what she felt was right. She was proud of her Left Wing socialist beliefs. At the same time when finding herself in the company of Margaret Thatcher many years later, she could acknowledge what they shared despite being at opposite ends of the political spectrum. Both strong women. Iron ladies? Irene would often laugh about how when learning to read she asked her brother why the toffees were called “supper” toffees if you had them during the day and he explained that they were Super Toffees. However, Irene’s intelligence was clear to her teachers and she passed for Grammar School. One real sadness throughout her life was that she never went as her brother took the King’s Shilling leaving her family unable to support the costs of such education. So Irene took her education in her own hands. She read the Reader’s Digest to improve her vocabulary and had the most amazing knowledge, particularly on subjects such as history. She passed this on to her children and grandchildren who all demonstrate a thirst for learning. Her legacy lives on in them. Imagine the woman who left school as a child seeing her daughter graduate from Cambridge University in 1990. What an amazing achievement far more so for Irene than for Catherine. Irene worked in the mill as a weaver, an invisible mender and a spinner starting work as a child whilst her peers started Grammar School. Irene found her true joy in cookery and was able to pursue this as a career working in local hospitals and schools and latterly in a squash club. Thinking about it realistically, Irene will have cooked and baked for thousands of people over the course of her life. And the lucky ones won’t forget her scones, her boozy Christmas Cake or her trifle! Irene was actually, despite appearances, a very shy person. She often put on a brave face and was anxious inside. She did not make friends easily. However, when she did take to somebody, she invested all of herself and expected a similar commitment in return. Loyalty and laughter came from special friends such as Nora Thornton and Joan Farrar. You can bet they are having a sing-song in heaven right now. She also valued more recent Ryedale friendships. Irene’s social life revolved around dances, bingo and family parties. There would be regular trips to London to see her brother Lawrence and when they were together, the party went on all night with whist and story-telling. Sometimes Irene would step right outside her comfort zone. At the age of 38, she took the local Town Hall by storm when along with three colleagues from the Catholic Women’s League and dressed in flapper 1920s costumes made from beach towels she sang “Don’t Bring Lulu” to wild acclaim. Later she would go on girlie weekends but return tut-tutting at the antics of those she went with. Irene made a good marriage with Kenneth and our sympathies go out to him today. We hope he is comforted by knowing he was the love of her life, her soulmate, her constant companion and her very best friend. They met on Irene’s birthday at a New Year’s Eve party. Irene took him home in fear and trepidation not sure how her father would react to a Protestant Policeman as both the religion and the occupation were anathema to him. She need not have worried. One of the sad parts of Irene going so soon is that they will miss their Diamond Anniversary. But that brings back memories of their Golden Anniversary when they renewed their vows with all their children and friends around them back in Dewsbury. There was an all-day merry party followed by Irene’s lifelong dream of a trip on the Orient Express the following Spring. Also so many holidays across the world with each other and with their children. She even managed to come to terms with the Germans and the French persuaded by the Bellevue Hotel in Boppard overlooking the Rhine and by her terrace at her rented house in France by the water’s edge. Of course, Irene being Irene, she also liked the local markets. Possibly due to the childhood poverty, she liked antiques, pretty things and sparkles. At Christmas, she would say that she liked the “little pressies” best meaning that these usually contained the jewellery. Ever the modern woman, when it was impossible for her to go out, she took her purse from the high street to the shopping channels. Or should we say, she took Kenneth’s credit card?! Irene and Kenneth have three children. Michael and Christopher were born in the Fifties. They played out with Michael showing a strong spirit for adventure and a love of animals often bringing home waifs and strays. Christopher may have been a little in Michael’s shadow. Some of that changed when he played Mr Bumble in an amateur production of Oliver. By now, people were noticing his emerging singing talent that would later become his career. Both boys were nursed through childhood illnesses, some quite serious, and also totally supported in their education even if that meant paying for private tuition out of limited means. Irene’s career was put on hold until the children went to school. Then in her thirties, she became a shopkeeper with two shops on the busy A62 Huddersfield Road. Selling a bit of everything – sweets, tobacco, dried goods, fruit and vegetables and taking in dry cleaning. Open all hours indeed! Remember she was juggling this with two boisterous boys. A worker of miracles like most mums. Irene is very much loved by her children. Michael described the news of his mum’s illness as “devastating”. Chris recalls crying when left at the school gate at the age of 5 and being just as upset when leaving for music college at 23 or France at 36. He explains how Irene asked him to treat her as a person not just a mother and that this led to their friendship in later years. Catherine is firm that her mum is the person she would most like to spend time with and is grateful for the new understanding she has of Irene now that she is herself a mum. However, I think all three children might agree that is was not always easy to have Irene as a mother. She was ready with advice and cuddles but not one to cosset her children. She wanted to make them independent and self-sufficient. She would say that “There’s no such word as can’t!” and encourage them to develop “backbone”. Also, she was, let’s face it, an incredibly hard act to follow. Looking at the remarkable achievements in very different fields of Michael, Christopher and Catherine, you may well think that Irene served them very well indeed. Irene never sought glory and was true to herself. When Catherine went to Cambridge, Irene would tell people “she’s still at school” rather than show off. More a lover of Dolly Parton and Jonny Cash, Boxcar Willie, George Melly and Freddie Mercury than Luciano Pavarotti, Chris had to force her to go La Scala and she was the first to admit that the best part of an opera at Glyndebourne was the picnic. She did, however, like shows such as Porgy and Bess and Carmen for their “good tunes” Church played a huge part in Irene’s life and she was a very active member whether running coffee mornings, organizing funeral teas, putting on dances or cleaning the brasses. She raised huge amounts of money for good causes and had a strong sense of community. Throughout her life, Irene would often find herself as a carer for parents, siblings and children. I think this probably made her a good patient herself, understanding the challenges faced by those who care whether professionally or out of love. Many mums breathe a sigh of relief when their children grow up. Irene, who always loved a challenge, decided instead to adopt baby Catherine. For Catherine, Irene is the woman who danced through crunchy Autumn leaves, who led the “slosh” at parish events and who introduced her to Cointreau. In recent weeks, Irene has regaled her nurses with stories of Friday evenings partying with her daughter. Catherine will tell you that these nights involved not only laughter but a fair amount of whisky too. Irene would laugh about her morphine and say “I have been looking for something like this all my life!” Today, there are three little ones who are with us in Pickering but not at Irene’s funeral at her request. Just after her Golden Wedding Anniversary and in Millennium Year, Irene’s long-held wish to be a grandma was fulfilled with the birth of Cavanagh Luke. Cavanagh was in Ryedale so there was little doubt in most people’s mind that sooner rather than later, Irene and Kenneth would upsticks from Dewsbury to live in Ryedale first in Welburn, then in Kirkham and for the last year in Pickering. It is impossible to find words to describe the close bond between Irene and her first grandson. Cavanagh will tell you “she was the one who told me how to deal with things”. He has so many days out with her in his memory bank, singing, dancing, laughing and sword-fighting. He takes forward Irene’s intelligence and sensitivity and wants everyone to know that “it’s not real exciting without grandma”. Irene’s grand-daughter, Willow is like her in many ways. A feisty woman in the making with a great love of music and the arts generally. One of Irene’s last gifts was a painted papier mache photo-frame. She spoke to the nurses with pride of that frame as if it belonged in the best art gallery. Irene had dabbled in art over the years and had a huge sense of style. As a young girl, she won a design competition. She left many drawings for her grandchildren to remember her by. Irene’s second grandson, Ramsey is 3 years old and a full-on character, full of beans. He has a wicked sense of humour and pulls the best funny faces. He is also caring taking a small chocolate egg to his Grandma at Easter saying “I have brought this to make you better”. When we had the news of Irene’s death, Ramsey smiled in his sleep and then giggled. Can’t you imagine Irene chuckling now and saying “I don’t know what you are all weeping and wailing about!” So how do we sum up the fabulous woman that was Irene? I leave you with two more quotes from people who knew her well. “Big-hearted” “Larger than life” It seems that if we all live our lives to the full and show compassion for those around us, Irene will have left a wonderful legacy indeed. So step outside your comfort zone and get involved with good causes and think of a very special lady. Here’s to Irene – we will miss you forever and remember you always.

I remember your mum at your wedding Kate. She was so proud of you and the children obviously thought she was the best Grandma in the world. She will be much missed. Hayley & Family

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal. Love leaves a memory no one can steal.With deepest sympathy to you and your family. Carmela & family.